A Wabi Wedding?

We came across a new word today - wabi. We searched the internet for the combination "wabi wedding" and found no such references. However, the somewhat difficult-to-interpret Japanese word seems to be a compelling adjective to describe the essence of The Good Bride's perfect wedding. Did I say "perfect"? Ooops, that's rather ironic since wabi refers to the beauty of imperfection. In other words, it is the flaw, the asymetry, and quirkiness of something that gives it its true elegance and distinguishes it. Examples of things that have wabi are a crooked branch, an aged piece of pottery with a chip, a weathered barn, handmade paper or a homemade meal, or the human face. Wabi is associated with peace unencumbered by material burdens, and the transience of nature. So, clearly a wabi wedding is all that this blog is devoted to - a wedding that allows you to be your full self by embracing simplicity and the history of what has grown, bloomed, and weathered rather than that which has been mass-produced. If you have eight bridesmaids who are all required to wear their hair up even when two or three hate their hair up, your wedding definitely lacks wabi. We'll be thinking more about this in future notes.

Elopement for The Good Bride

Elopement is one of the very best and purely romantic ways to save loads of money as well as the terror associated with a traditional wedding. We so, so often hear brides say that if they had to do it all over again, they would not have not allowed someone (like Mom or MIL) to hijack their wedding, and would have escaped to the magical and blissful land of the quick, secret wedding. One of the most exciting days I had was nearly 30 years ago when my mother got married for the second time. It was a spur-of-the-moment decision, and she got married the same day she got engaged. The only ones in attendance were myself, my boyfriend at the time, and the judge. Afterwards, we took a few pictures (truly happy-looking ones), and ate lunch at a quaint restaurant. Take note, however - a nasty, sour moment occured when we met at my uncle's for dinner, and she made the announcement to her own mother who had never even met the husband. Nevertheless, they are still married today, as are many famous elopees (Sarah Palin) - just don't pull a Britney Spears and elope while intoxicated. So, is it really okay to be a Good Bride and elope? Absolutely! Some elope because they perceive that their only other choices are having a $28,000 wedding or serving punch, mints, and pimento cheese sandwiches in the church basement (of course, there are other options - that's a lot of what this blog is about). THE challenge for The Good Bride in elopement is how she tells other people. If the bride does not wish parents to be present for the elopement, she should call them the same day and break the news. If I were the mother-of-the-bride, I would also love a personal sweet email and a photographed emailed to me on the same day. Next, the Good Bride should inform as many others in her circle of closer friends and family as possible - and then try to post lots of pictures on a social network like FaceBook right away (that very day would be swell). If someone, like Mom or Dad, reacts even a little negatively to the news, understand that they are in shock, and get off the phone politely as soon as possible, letting them know when you will be visiting them.

Locally-Grown Reception is in Good Taste

One of the most delicious ways to be an earth-friendly Good Bride is to use locally-grown, organic foods for your reception. For example, for a Georgia wedding, menu items might be Stone Ground Whole Corn Grits, Warm Banana Bread, Tomato Basil Mozarella Salad, Peach Salsa or Chutney to accompany the meat (ham, grilled trout, chicken), and Toasted Pecans. These could be used by a caterer, but we are seeing more and more brides and grooms who are buying their own foods locally and then preparing them communally, with the help of friends. The cost savings in the latter approach could be astronomical, and in most cases, the food will taste much fresher and pleasing. These days it's pretty easy to find a farmer's market, even in small towns. In fact, LocalHrvest.org has an easy-to-use website that allows you to search for Farmer's Markets in any zip code. Even better - you can probably pick up some locally-grown, organic flowers and plants at a Farmer's Market as well for a fraction of the cost that the florist will charge. Photo by karen.fromthelbc

Blue Skies, Green Weddings, and White Daisies

We think we'll be seeing a huge increase in the number of earth-friendly wedding favors over the next months. In the interim, it takes a little more work to find something that is both eco and incredibly cute. We think these seed-paper daisy wedding favors fit the bill, particularly for a spring or summer wedding. Each packet holds 5 seed daisies and they are sold in a lot of 15 packs. The only worry is whether or not your guests will plant them or just hang on to them. The good news is that if they do get thrown away, maybe our landfills will start coming up daisies.

Is Green the New White?

No, white is still the most popular wedding dress color. But having a green wedding is no longer something only associated with being way out of the mainstream, or geeky or hippy. Amazon.com has come up with a whole new green store, and wedding dress designers are lining up like wedding guests at an open bar to get in on the new coolness factor. What's behind all this greening up? Is it that the incredible cost of gas has finally gotten people responding seriously about the depletion of resources? We think it may also have something to do with a backlash against the wedding madness of over-the-top extravagance and the now-dull perfectionism of the Martha Stewart 90s. Whatever the cause, we are glad that the Good Bride does not have to worry about being hip.

Organic YumYums for the Good Reception

While we like to advocate locally-grown food for your reception (no transportation pollution), every now and then we note something supreme in the way of organic preparation and reception or gift appeal. These Cho-Co Espresso Wedges are 100 percent organic and use fair-trade ingredients. Available from Kaikai YumYum Shop on Etsy. $12.95 for 15.

Welcome to The Good Bride!

We believe that the ridiculously oppulent wedding funded by second mortgages and seven maxed-out credit cards is becoming a thing of the past. We believe that brides-to-be are becoming almost as weary of their own empty self-absorption as their bridesmaids, family and friends are tiring of their petulant need for attention. We believe that, in spite of the obscene lengths to which brides will go to impress their guests, most decadent weddings have become somewhat indistinguishable and predictable. We believe that, underneath the layers of tulle and chartreuse and magenta matching favors and table cards, the inner heart of many brides is quietly hoping for permission to wed in a manner that better reflects her joy, love, and genuine nature. The purpose of this blog is to provide creative resources and inspiration for the bride who wishes to plan a rich and meaningful wedding minus the harsh toll on her relationships, the environment, and her finances.